Version 2: Polished and Idiomatic

Today unfolded differently from the past few weeks. Yesterday, we had an extraordinary experience at a concert in the Konzerthaus Berlin. Naturally, this Schinkel-designed building is magnificent. Since the orchestra welcomed a new conductor, the brilliant Joana Mallwitz, the venue has taken on a new vibrancy. It felt as though the orchestra deeply admires its conductor, and the feeling is mutual. Joana Mallwitz inspired the musicians, and they, in turn, inspired her. The final piece of the evening, Beethoven’s iconic 5th Symphony, was performed so breathtakingly that I don’t think I’ve ever heard it played better. When we got home, we didn’t even replay the symphony on YouTube as we often do after concerts; it simply couldn’t compare.

For unrelated reasons, I had a hard time sleeping that night. I switched to thinking in English but couldn’t revert to more comforting thoughts in German. After breakfast, I volunteered for our weekly grocery shopping trip. Later, I tried some light gymnastics and Feldenkrais exercises, but they didn’t go as smoothly as usual. A walk was out of the question; I knew it wouldn’t go well—too much pain. Instead, I listened to a few short English texts and read two pages of Brave New World aloud. I think my pronunciation is steadily improving.

Version 1: Minimal Corrections

This day was going differently than the days of the past few weeks. Yesterday, we had a wonderful experience at a concert in the Konzerthaus Berlin. Of course, this building, designed by Schinkel, is very impressive. Since the orchestra gained a new conductor, the brilliant Joana Mallwitz, this building has taken on quite a new shine. We had the impression that the orchestra loves its conductor and vice versa. This woman inspired all the players, and the players inspired her. The last piece of the evening, Beethoven’s famous 5th Symphony, was performed in such an overwhelming way as I have never heard before. After arriving home, we were unable to replay the symphony on YouTube as we often did after previous concert visits.

 

Not because of the concert, I had big difficulties falling asleep last night. I switched on my English thinking and couldn’t turn back to my calming German thoughts. After breakfast, I decided to take over our weekly trip for grocery shopping. Afterwards, I tried a little gymnastics and some Feldenkrais exercises, but they didn’t work as usual. Strolling also didn’t seem possible. I felt it wouldn’t go sufficiently well, meaning: without pain. Therefore, I listened to a few short English texts and read aloud two pages of Brave New World. I believe it sounds better and better.

Originaltext 

This day runs in another way than the days of the last weeks before. Yesterday we had a very great experience with a concert in the Konzerthaus Berlin. Of course, this building built by Schinkel is a very impressive one. After this orchestra has got a new conductor, a woman conductor, the brilliant Joana Malwitz, this building has quite a new glance. We have got the impression the orchestra loves its conductor and vice versa. This woman inspired all the players and the players inspired her. The last piece of this evening, the famous 5th symphony by Ludwig van Beethoven, was played in such an overwhelming way as I never heard before. After having been at home, we were not able to repeat the symphony on TV with YouTube we did it very often after former concert visits.

Not because of the concert, I had big difficulties to sleep in this night. I switched on my English thinking and couldn’t turn to kindly thoughts on German. After breakfast, I decided to take over our weekly trip for buying groceries. Afterwards, I tried a little gymnastic and some Feldenkrais exercises, but it didn’t work as usual. Strolling seems also not possible. I felt it will not go sufficiently well, this means: without pains. Therefore, I heard some small English texts and was reading aloud two pages of brave new word. I believe it sounds better and better.